365 Writing · Stories

Super Hero Fatigue

Just another day getting groceries for Walter Wallace. And by that, he meant something more akin to almost dying as Captian Super and Dr. McEvil had some form of “epic” showdown in the parking lot.

As Walter waited for the paramedics to give him the all-clear before he could return home, he signed and texted his wife about the delay. Everyone in the city had gotten used to it at this point. Since superheroes and supervillains had started to come out of the woodwork, it had been a veritable shit show. Everyone with a cape or no cape, who thought they could impose their super-powered will on the city had shown up to attack to defend it.

The medical staff was being overworked to the bone, and the city construction was working around the clock to repair the damage. Everyone was saying that taxes were going to shoot through the roof next year or the city council would go bankrupt. Many people wanted the supers gone, but there was no easy way to do so without leaving an open door for the villains.

The paramedics finally got to examine Walter, he had a mild concussion due to a car having been thrown at his head by Dr. McEvil (Why the Mc? Was he Irish? Clearly, it was a made-up name so why keep the Mc? Walter had been puzzling this over for the last hour). Thankfully Captian Super (was she a real captain? Like ex-military?), had saved him but one of the tires had still clipped the side of his head. At least he could be happy he was even insured. Most employers had started canceling insurance benefits until there was a city-wide cry of outrage and the government locked it in place. That of course, didn’t stop premiums from going up. Unless it was innately life threating, most people went untreated.

“So much for helping the city,” Walter mumbled out loud, following his train of thought.

The paramedic nodded. “You don’t have to tell me twice,” He said dabbing some of the blood off. “I haven’t seen my family in months now or slept longer than three hours straight. We just got a call that we’re going to have to head out in a couple minutes due to a fight between Mr. Kick-Butt and The Wasp Woman down at the docks.

“Sounds wonderful,” Walter said sarcastically. “Can I go now doc?”

The paramedic gestured for him to leave and Walter grabbed his now partially spoiled groceries and made his way to check on his car. Thankfully it was still there this time, he could see as he walked toward it, other than a minor dent in the side it was virtually untouched. “Stroke of luck.” He murmured to himself as he reached into his pocket for his keys.

Suddenly from out of the sky, a man landed on top of the car all dressed in white. Another man followed slamming the first man harder into the vehicle. Crumpling it into a heap of glass and metal.

“Never fear citizens!” The second man said the giant bold letters of BJ were embossed on his brightly colored unitard. “Mr. Brave Justice  is here to save you!” He pronounced loudly.

“My F-ing car!” Walter exclaimed.